When Urban Dictionary Is Oh So Right…

By: Chris Paraskevas | October 6th, 2009

I barely knew of the existence of Urban Dictionary until a few weeks ago and perhaps its best that way, seeing as how I would have been tempted to use it as I desperately completed a number of university assignments with only hours remaining till their deadline last semester – I’m not sure my lecturers would have appreciated it as a source.

But on this occasion, it seems to serve my ‘journalistic’ purposes perfectly. One definition of “AEK” it gives is thus:

second team in Athens, way after Panathinaikos
Gate 13 hools killed those AEK pussies

Add Olympiakos into the mix and push AEK down to third and you have the comprehensive description of a joke of a football side.

Why the sudden impassioned rant you ask?

It was only a few days ago that a wave of optimism flooded fan forums following a surprising 1-0 win at home to the in-form Benfica in the Europa League, temporarily banishing recent memories of consecutive defeats at home against rivals Olympiakos and Panathinaikos.

48-or-so hours later and I find myself roused at the hour of 3am, with just under two hours of sleep and preparing to wake for work at 10 am, about to watch what is quite possibly the most diabolical performance of any football team that I have followed during my 19 years on this planet.

The opposition? Xanthi.

Don’t know who they are? Most Greeks probably don’t – but they outplayed a visiting AEK outfit seemingly devoid of any desire to win the match and – and this is most important – without any empathy for the tired carcass that dragged itself out of bed to watch them at the most un-Godly of hours.

The farcical nature of the goal epitomized an evening of football that was about as engaging as re-runs of “Friends” (Quite possibly the worst comedy/sit-com in the history of broadcasting) and one that was, according to a few of the members of a fan forum that I frequent in an attempt to find an outlet for my considerable anguish, representative of some sort of overriding conspiracy theory whereby AEK are denied a fair chance at success by Olympiakos.

The harsh reality is that this is a football club in steady decline and one that can, for the moment at least, no longer be called a giant of Greek football.

At least if they played at a decent hour I wouldn’t lose so much sleep over them (literally).